FROM YOUR MOUTH (and Deeds) To Street People's Ears

• There are 250,000 to 300,000 street people in Canada; 40% are under 25 years of age...-Operation Go Home
• What to look for besides your own attitude:
  • Withdrawing from friends and school activities
  • Abrupt mood changes and temper flare-ups
  • Increased rule breaking at home and school
  • Depression and continuing feelings of "I can't do anything right."
  • Comments about things being better "somewhere else"
  • Take their threats to run away seriously and urge them to talk to someone - their parents, a school counselor, a shelter - before doing anything.

PREVENTION

The best way to prevent a runaway incident is to regularly spend time with each of your children and insure that their home is a safe, comfortable, and enjoyable place where they feel loved and wanted. Give them your full attention and listen to them in a non-judgmental way.

• Take their concerns seriously. Don't dismiss their worries and fears.
• If you find yourself saying "You shouldn't feel that way..." shut your mouth immediately.  They already DO feel that way, and you have no right to deny anyone's feelings.
• Pay attention when they ask you for help. Make your responsiveness to them a priority by taking second place for a change.  This is no about you.
• Confront trouble signs directly, firmly and calmly. Discuss your concerns and the consequences of continued unacceptable behavior. Avoid lectures.
• Talk with others. Your children's friends, their parents, or your children's teachers.  They may have helpful suggestions.
• Speak with professional counselors about the situation.
• Before they reach the age of greatest risk, pick up a few appropriate books and read.  Remember books?  They the flat rectangular things with pages...

WARNING SIGNS

It's easy to confuse signs of trouble with the usual adolescent turmoil; but when real problems occur, the indications outlined here usually come in clusters. The following warning signs should cause concern rather than alarm:

• Sleep changes including fatigue, early morning wakening, insomnia and increased sleeping.
• Personality changes including abrupt mood swings, excessive blowups triggered by small incidents, apathy, boredom, irritability, and obsession with a single thought.
• Withdrawal from the family including growing isolation, increased violation of house rules, and avoidance of family gatherings at meals or other events.
• School problems including declining grades, truancy, cutting classes and disciplinary problems.
• Rejection or withdrawal from friends including fights with friends, hostility towards former friends, new older friends, and reluctance to introduce new friends to parents.
• Overreaction to family traumas such as prolonged reaction to loss or stress resulting from death, divorce, illness, loss of a job, or a move to another town or city.
• In short, trust your instincts if you have them. Most good parents often have "gut" feelings that detect when and if something is wrong.

IF YOUR CHILD RUNS AWAY

• Think Clearly. Where might he or she go? Check with a friend, relative, neighbor, or former spouse.
• Write it Down. Keep a record of everyone you contact. Write down your own feelings just to clear your head.
• Look for Clues. Check your son or daughter's room for signs of preparation. Ask friends, teachers, coaches for ideas. Check "hangout" spots.
• Take Action. File a missing persons report with your local police department. Ask the police to put the information on the NCIC computer.  Don't take "No" or "We're too busy with important things." for an answer.  If your police department won't get off their fat posteriors because of "Department Policy" or "Donut Breaks" let the media know immediately they're sitting on their ... (hands)   
  
  FAMILY DYNAMICS

• Your child(ren) didn't fill out a birth reservation and they didn't ask for you as a parent.  Face up to your own obligations and responsibilities.  If it goes this far you're the one(s) out of control.  There are groups and organizations all over the web that are willing to help you, but they can't do it for you.
• We all have to take both an exam and a drivers test to get a drivers license but not a marriage license so we are all bound to have trouble.
• Twice as many teens run from a two parent household than single parent.  Since most single parent households are headed by females what is that supposed to tell us? (GAO Report on Homeless 1989 USA)
• Twice as many teenage girls run as teenage boys, and these are runners not abductees. (GAO Report on Homeless 1989 USA)

WHO'S AT RISK

• 1 & Under  1%            "... and the survey says..."
• 12               3%            ages 13 - 17 are when most
• 13              10%           teens find that living in your house
• 14              18%           isn't as fantastic as you'd have
• 15              24%           everyone believe mainly because
• 16              25%           you're living in it.  - The Old Bald Guy.
• 17              18%
• 18               2%  

IF THEY DO COME HOME

    A MAJOR CHANGE IS NOT REQUIRED -
           A MAJOR IMPROVEMENT IS!          

"We Gotta Get Outa This Place" [If It's The Last Thing We Ever Do...]

Last Updated 29/04/2000 16:53:54 -0230